Tuesday, December 2, 2008

A text message:

The world is certainly mocking me, Patrick. I am certain of it. What I believe to be a single endeavor inevitably ends up in many places. You, Patrick, appear to be part of this conspiracy. The conspiracy against me in which there is a crowd that dissects my perceived intentions and presumes them to be more than they are. Can you see how this would make me feel like I must eventually be in multiple places at once, when I only want to be in one? This is how the world mocks me. This is why I cannot desire anything with superb confidence. I am too concerned my objective or passion will be misconstrued. Why must my existence be validated (invalidated?) based on this conglomeration of these conceptions? Patrick, sometimes I intend my words to expire with time or another form that makes them somehow distant or foreign. I think this happens very easily. I don't want to use the word "metatextual" for fear of reactionary remarks. I believe in a metatextual outline intended to govern communication. I feel like this has been violated. I'm not sure if this violation will be beneficial or not.

I know this confession will not be redistributed beyond my control, left out like an old fruit, inviting every irresponsibly reproducing fly.

No comments: